The Secret Behind Negotiation

There’s a stereotypical prototype of what a “good” lawyer is. The common phrase is that you want a lawyer who is a shark or a pit bull. The best lawyer is seen as one who bulldozes over your opponent and makes sure they get their way, every time.

This couldn’t be further from the lawyer you want when it comes to family law.

Family law is not meant to be an abrasive and nasty practice. Most people want their family law matters, whether that be their divorce, child custody, or modification case, to be handled efficiently, civilly, and as outside of the courts as possible.

One of the biggest skills to look for in a family lawyer is a skilled negotiator. In a divorce, there will be some give and take. Your lawyer is there to make sure that if you are in conflict with your ex-spouse over one thing, she can use it as leverage to make sure you get something in the divorce that matters even more to you.

Harvard Law recently released a report on negotiation and, while the findings seem simple, it seems that people often forget the key to good negotiating: strong rapport. Building relationships with those around you and coming at people with an openness and willingness to connect is crucial for a beneficial negotiation.

So, next time you hear that you should pick a lawyer who is a shark, keep in mind that some of the best lawyers are those who greet everyone with a smile and work amicably with all parties as their strategic way to look out for your best interests.